Everyone thinks they’re the expert on your life and loves to give you advice. Most of it is complete garbage.
Here are 15 of the most popular nay-saying tips and why you can tell them to shove it.
1. Your dream is unrealistic. What’s unrealistic is trying to live your life working at a job you don’t love doing something you hate for the rest of your life while regretting trying to live your dream.
2. You’re screwed if it doesn’t work out. No, you’re not. In fact, the worst possible scenario is that you go back to what you would be doing if you hadn’t pursued your dream. That’s the worst possible scenario.
3. You weren’t cut out for that. Who’s to say that? If you don’t fit the stereotype for your dream then you’re the one to break the mold. You will stand out.
4. You can follow your dream someday. Someday will never come. Follow your dream today.
5. Only a few people “make it.” That’s because they lack the drive, determination, and will that you have. You’re one of the few.
6. You should just be safe and get a job. In fact, a job is even more dangerous than pursuing your dream. Not only do you feel terrible doing something you don’t want to do, but with two simple words your livelihood can change. “You’re fired.” When you’re pursuing your dream, you’re the only one that can stop you.
7. That’s impossible. Yes it’s impossible. For them. Not for you though, because you can dream and make it real.
8. You would have to go through so much work to do that. Yeah, but you’re willing to do it. You know what you want and you know what you have to do to get there. To you it’s not work, it’s what you want to do with your life.
9. You don’t need a backup plan. Yes, you do. Even if it’s just for supplemental income, use your talent or perfect your dream by doing something that may not be the exact same, but is related. It’s always better to be good at two things than one.
10. It’s a one in a million chance. No, actually, it’s probably less. But it doesn’t matter to you, because you know you’re going to do it. That’s what really matters.
11. Bad things will happen. Failures are just steps towards success. Any successful entrepreneur will tell you that. If you can’t handle failure, then success is going to be very difficult to achieve.
12. You won’t be able to live off that. If you can do it and find an avenue that will pay you for it, then yes you can live off of your dream. Even people who can fit into a box found an market for their talent that people would pay them to perform.
13. You’re going to be the next “BLANK.” No, you’re not. You’re going to be the next YOU. Don’t follow the mold, be different. Be yourself.
14. That’s a lot of pressure. Of course there is; it’s your life. That doesn’t matter to you though because you’re willing to take it on and make it your own.
15. You have to do this, this, and this, to do that. Wrong. Follow what you believe and find your own way to achieve your dream. Studying those who have succeeded in the same field helps, but copying won’t get you anywhere.
If you can disregard these bits of “advice” people give you, you’re well on your way to succeeding.
Don’t let their jealousy and worry get you down.
Now go own the world.-Ravi Vora
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I have spent the last two days going through your blog. And I love it.
I really needed to read this post today. What a great affirmation of life. You’re pretty wise for someone so young. :)
Nice article. I personally say take the middle path, because sometimes a job can help finance the dream. Life is not black and white, and we have to make concrete decisions that will lead to concrete results.
Regards, Keith
I wish someone had given me this advice when I was in high school. I wanted to become a writer and a teacher of creative writing, but I was told I wasn’t cut out for college because of poor math grades. Then I opted to pursue an associate degree in commercial art instead. I was told (by an art teacher I adored) that the industry was cut throat and that I wasn’t talented enough. Finally, in desperation, I went to my guidance counselor. I was 18 and out of options as to what I would be when I “grew up.” He suggested I go to beauty school.
I have a lot of regrets about the time I wasted in my teens and early 20s. But I have a career I love now (as a writer) and I’m finally content. It only took me 20 years to figure out how to get there.
The bottom line is…listen to the best of the advice you receive, but don’t take it too seriously. Follow your own path.
I enjoyed reading this post. There is a great deal of truth in what you say here. There are simply too many ways in which to stop people from achieving their goals or dreams.
I do think, though, that many of the nay-sayings you mention here are things we say to ourselves rather than hear from others. It is quite often our own negativity which holds us back.
This list should be broadcasted on all the major TV networks around the globe at peak times, it’s so good.
All of these “lies” are the result of an old-school education of thought. And the hilarious thing about these is that I often hear unsuccessful people preaching them! Listening to those people is like going to a starving beggar to ask for food.
The best path to follow will always remain the most beautiful and simple one: don’t listen to ANY advices! All advices are merely guidelines and should be treated accordingly.
Thank you. I’m glad I found this site. In the morning I will print this out and tape it next to the computer monitor at my job. My situation is similar to KaylyRed’s. My 12th grad art teacher told me that art school was too expensive and that I should try community college. Funny how she encouraged another student to pursue art though. Community college was a waste of time. After 3 years I enrolled in a 12 month graphics program only to not find any steady work which is how I ended up where I am today. It was time to start paying on those student loans.
I gave up my dreams and focused on relationships. Watching others around me achieve their goals made me feel left out. I still feel that way. I as encouraged over the years to try but I was afraid and somewhat content. I’m older now(30ish) but, I’m going to take that step this time. I don’t want to wake up as a 60 year old and start playing the “what if” game. Thanks again.
I feel pumped up. I’ve been developing a Ad Exchange system for the last two years and needed a good motivational article. Thanks!
Fucking spot on, forgive my french. Have StumbledUpon this having just got back from travelling after doing a bloody hard science degree that noones ever heard of. Sod everyone else, go for it.
dude, thanx 4 the killa list! i always wanted 2 b an astronot, but ppl told me that u need to do lots of school and im not so good at the school stuff. now i no that if i just go and do it i can live my dream!
If you are going to have a dream, you might as well make it a good one. Dream big
dreams, they take the same amount of effort, and have just as much chance of coming
true.
Hi Ravi Vora,
Posted this in my blog. Good read and insightful.
Made me pause and think about where my life is heading.
Thanks!
This is awesome - most people who will be saying this type of thing are NOT where we want to be anyway. It seems most people aren’t only afraid of success, but terrified that YOU might become successful as well.
Ravi, great article. My dream of becoming a writer was put on hold for over 30 years. Through the advise and help of a relatively “new” internet friend, since June 1. 2007, I have set up my own blog and I am writing. I love it. Apparently, so do my readers. My stats are slowly and steadily moving upward. Even a 3 weeks absence while I was recently on a Spiritual Retreat in India hasn’t affected the stats. I am surprised. I thought there would be a dip in the numbers but there hasn’t been.
Follow your dreams… to the bitter end.
Your dream will probably demand a lot.
Not just hard work but sacrifice. Family, Social Life, Money. Your dream is a cold taskmaster. Your dream is not a destination it’s a journey. You just don’t arrive at your dream like a vacation spot. It keeps going and going, always demanding. Don’t think it will be easy, or fun. If your lucky it could be rewarding.
I agree completely.
I started with cross country this year in the summer, and when I started I was slow. Slower than Sean Hale, and he’s pretty slow. But I’ve been to practice every day except for special cases (doctor’s appointments, illness), and I’ve been determined to get better.
Guess what? I’m going to the championship race in a few weeks! So that basically means I’m one of the top seven girls on the team.
(Which is surprising, because I did REALLY bad on today’s race because of trick-or-treating. But the race before I did extremely well, so that probobly helped.)
I’ve just one word to say after reading this post:
“FANTASTIC!” I fell in love with your posts lol :D
Hi Ravi, very inspiring, thanks! When one is feeling like giving up, they need to remember that enthusiasm and patience in perusing their dream will finally help achieving success. And it’s such a great reward on its own — to be doing what you are passionate about in your life.
2. You’re screwed if it doesn’t work out. No, you’re not. In fact, the worst possible scenario is that you go back to what you would be doing if you hadn’t pursued your dream. That’s the worst possible scenario.
Sorry, but that’s total bullshit. I’ve been there and lost everything - life savings, friends, life partner, reputation and more. Not saying I would change anything but to pretend there aren’t big things at stake when you really go out on a limb is idealistic and naive.
I don’t want to be too negative here - it’s great to follow your dreams and most of the rest of what you say is spot on… but please remember there are usually huge risks that come with huge reward.
Unless you’ve ever had a catastrophic failure yourself then you certainly aren’t qualified to talk about it. Maybe you should have a few more life experiences under your belt before giving out such advice?
It’s 4:53a.m. and I had just caught your blog by way of google tangent. Hey, I’m lovin it…Theres a song I heard and liked called “switching to glide” I heard a while back that say’s “nothing matters but the weekend from a tuesday point of view”…I say, with out the pursuit of your dream your still stuck in the Mondays…….peace
I just stumbled upon this post — I Love It!
Dream Big and Follow Your Own Inner Voice!
Thanks! ;)
Wow. This post just made me subscribe to your blog right away. Good stuff, dead on. Better to try than to end up like so many miserable people who’ve given up and just stumble through life…
That’s a great list.
No.2 really stood out for me because I know it’s true.
We went bust after purusing our dream. But we started again and the dream has come true.
Actually, I’ve just realised, I don’t agree that it was the worst scenario. I didn’t have to go back to what I was doing before, I just got on with the dream and made it come true.
Fear play a major part in all of this. Good work and thanks for putting this out! I listened to a great podcast about the many faces of FEAR in life and how to close the door on it. Give a listen;
http://www.transworldynamics.com/content/blogcategory/9/26/
Hi Ravi,
I just found a comment from you on my Act On Your Dream! lens on Squidoo and found your blog. I’m enjoying it very much.
I am going to link to this blog entry in my next newsletter, and hope to follow your thoughts in the future.
I’d like to invite you to share your thoughts on my forum and a social networking site I just set up. If you are interested, let me know and I’ll send you the URLs.
It’s always great finding someone else who believes in dreams and dreamers.
Act on your dream!
JD
Just wanted to say I printed this out in mini format and it now lives in my wallet. Thanks for sharing, I’m gonna pull this out every time I encounter one of those lines :)
This help’s so much, i was kinda giving up on any of my dreams… Because i look at the people around me and they have nothing. Thanks so much
Luv it ,
As said before, you truly are wise beyond your years , I
wish i had read this 15 years ago (I’m a ripe old 30 now). I’ve been surrounded by negativity my entire life. I’m a an unhappily married ,stay @ home mother of three. I feel I’m where I am because I allowed myself to become a product of the negativity that so often infects so many. I accidentally “fell” upon this sight goofing around out of sheer boredom. And I wanted to Thank You Good Sir, for you - have inspired me beyond all others. After reading your tips I have since started classes to get my G.E.D.(good enough diplma:)! )And I’m looking into furthering my education & following my own dreams as they have been put on the shelf for way too long. P.S.If you’re ever looking to make 15 a 16, how about something along the lines of “It’s too late for you now, you’re too old.”- That’s seriously a misconception that leads to so many giving up too easily. And to me, I’m so ready to begin the pursuit to my dreams, without our dreams what do we have ? Again -thank you!
Ravi,
Awesome post! so true. Excellent Post brother!
Jayson
www.revolutionarymanblog.com
thanks alot. am finding real answers iam at cross roads in my life i feel ineed to start up something leave alegacy i just donot think am ordinary just passing by. thanks i will be glad to also get anewsletter thanks amillion hey by the way am writing from uganda east africa
This article is spot on Ravi. I can definitely relate to what it says considering that I’ve been plodding along doing a silly microbiology degree when what I really love and am good at is programming. I’ve heard every one of those derisive comments at least once. Thanks, I’ll keep this article very close to my heart…
Hi Ravi,
I couldn’t have come across with your post at a better time.
Tomorrow is the 1st day of my 1-month trial to become a Campaign Analyst at Mark. - M&C Saatchi (Sydney, Australia)
I’ve always done creative things as a kid (playing instruments, writing, singing, drawing+painting, just making random things).
However, after migrating to Australia (from Korea) about 9 years ago, I had to choose something more “safe” for my family as I’m the older of 2 daughters.
While being stuck in a Commerce degree, majoring in ACCOUNTING, I’ve never stopped dreaming of entering the world of creativity.
I reinvented myself via Twitter and my blog, broadened my horizon and built up invaluable friendships as well as contacts.
Who knows what the future holds? I have no problem admitting that I’m a bit scared as well as very excited - I’m only human. One thing I do know is that I believe in myself, to make it happen and that I am more ready to put in more than what it takes.
Your article is just that little nudge I need, especially today.
Thank you so much, Ravi.
Rina *bear hugs* :)
Nicely described. If only everyone realises the reality.
This is great! Thanks.
and here are some more:
Have you heard about 2012? and about the Law of Attraction? and about Karma? about UFOs… etc etec
Well, I’m not going to dispute whether the above are real or not, but I am going to tell you that for years I’ve been frozen from pursuing my dreams because of these extra-ordinary philosophical issues.
They’re addictions looking for predictions, and each day I find myself searching the web looking to see if there’s a new conspiracy discovered or disclosed. In short, I’ve been wasting my time!
After reading this post, I feel I’m back on track to pursue my dreams of tertiary study. The reason I stopped is that after stumbling upon the 2012 predictions, I began to doubt whether my dream was worth pursuing, after all if the world’s going to end, what’s the point! And if we’re due for karmic cleansing, well I’m done for! And if Law of Attraction really exists, and thought gets you what you want … well where’s my slice of the pie?
This post has helped me somewhat - and it’s good to read some normal advice.
thanks
Rose